Archive for the ‘Atlantic City’ Category

Artie is back

Artie is back today although he claims to still be sick. He told Howard that he has a chest cold and it feels like Captain Lou Albano is sitting on his chest.
Howard wanted Artie to admit on the air that he was canceling the Borgata this weekend, but Artie said that he has a few more days to recover and that he should be fine by then.
Artie’s illness even made the home page of Sirius‘ website.


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Artie the Terrible

Howard got a call from Jeff the Drunk this morning and Jeff immediately asked Artie if he could get him a room at the Borgata for Artie’s performance on February 16th. Artie made a deal with Jeff that he would pay him $200 to come up on stage and show his ass. In typical Jeff fashion, that wasn’t enough for him. He asked Artie if he could get him a room because he and his manager will be drunk and won’t be able to drive home after the gig. Howard acted as Artie’s agent and told Jeff that Artie will pay him the $200 just to stay home. This insulted Jeff and he hung up. Jeff called back two more times and eventually said forget it because his manager felt insulted.

In the meantime, Artie mentioned that he wanted to get Teddy a uniform. He said that Teddy always looks like a mess and it would be better for Artie’s appearance if his assistant was well-dressed, perhaps in a suede suit. Teddy came into the studio and said the only way that he would wear a uniform is if Artie paid him more. This lead Artie to get annoyed because Teddy is the highest paid part-time assistant ever. JD than came in and told Howard that he always has to talk Teddy off of the ledge because he always feels insulted by Artie.

I have a bit of advice for you Artie… don’t get involved with Jeff the Drunk anymore and get a real assistant!

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